asd - aa.aa.aa
Paranoia Agent - 11.aa.22
Frank Henenlotter - 11.aa.22
Memories - 11.12.22
Sun Dogs - 11.6.22
Faith - 11.5.22
Anodyne 2 - 11.5.22

BACK
Media.
This has become extremely tedious to edit relative to any blogging platform -- tumblr, letterboxd, instagram -- to the benefit of noone, as noone but me will view this page. stop snooping
Who knows when I finished this. Who knows? Episode 8 was beautiful, a triplet of misfits deciding to suicide, each in a vastly different stage of life. Failing. Finding joy in community, but still wanting to kill themselves (it would be saccharine if they decided not to within a half hour episode). The last two episodes I bought a joint and was kind of out of it, but I found the detective's wife's monologue corny and expository.
I watched the movies Brain Damage and Basket Case. They were goofy and my attention would drift sometimes but I admire the sensory info. It communicates a lot more of the teammwork, passion and craftiness of the film crew and sometimes depicts cartoonish fantasies of sex and violence that are a comfort to me. I think because they speak to instincts that are most natural to an animal (me) (and you). Sex is the instinct for construction and violence is the instinct for destruction. Any feelings more complex can be tangled in ego and other retarded crap depending on my mood, so these two, especially represented in a cartoonish, guileless way, are a deep comfort and soothe my general, day-2-day confusion.

I edited together some of the most beautiful audio/visual moments from Brain Damage which had more exciting music and vfx... Hallucinations
...
A good first impression. It's somehow undermined as a world to explore. I'm not sure if mechanically or narratively. I think mechanically. Static, it looks intriguing. In motion, the world feels unremarkable. Maybe it's the character's gait. It's mostly the format, an open circle in which NPCs, standing in place, quip or offer the Zelda dungeons. It's literally worse link to the past, mechanically and narratively. The only modern addition, 3D and an overbearing consideration for the audience, are both to the detriment of the pace and your agency.
It's like that card game War. You put down cards until you win or lose. This is like narrative War. You roll anecdotes and sometimes you die, sometimes you get something. Sometimes you have something that prevents you from dying. Sometimes you have something that gets you another thing. The addition here is the inventory. Stack enough things and the deck starts to increase.
...
I thought it was very interesting. The first time I've been glued for an hour-ish in a week maybe. At this point in my life, I think the beauty of minimalism is to evoke your imagination. Ideally, you eventually pull back the curtain and find something more visualized. It should be like a dark room. There's minimal inputs: walk forward. But eventually you start bumping into things and mapping out what's in the dark, and it's more than just a rectangle filled with black.
...
My two cents on the merits of minimalism. I'm not a minimalist. But the point is, it has its place.
Kind of boring.
...
I'm thinking of games in these terms lately: what does it teach me? What does it show me? What does it give me? I'm trying to learn. Something. About communication and feelings of dread, and my own creative impulse. I'm looking for someone that's going through the same things to compartmentalize the feelings that are chaotic to me.
...
I like the rotoscoping. I like the voices. Edit in retrospect: I cut the main content of this entry (before publishing, not just now) because it was extremely personal and tangentially related to the game, leaving this barren paragraph. I'm not going to try to explain myself but I thought I should note this to myself on the website, that on 11.5.22 I succumbed to the shame of oversharing, even on this website meant for no one, at the time of writing, but myself.